Introduction

A real-life neurological mystery?and captivating story of reinvention by the New York Times bestselling author of The Daring Book for Girls.

Andrea Buchanan lost her mind while crossing the street one blustery March morning. The cold winter air triggered a coughing fit, and she began to choke. She was choking on a lot that day. A sick son. A pending divorce. The guilt of failing as a partner and as a mother. When the coughing finally stopped, she thought it was over. She could not have been more wrong.

When she coughed that morning, a small tear ripped through her dura mater, the membrane covering the brain and spinal cord. But she didn’t know that yet. Instead, Andrea went on with her day, unaware that her cerebrospinal fluid was already beginning to leak out of that tiny opening.

What followed was nine months of pain and confusion as her brain, no longer cushioned by a healthy waterbed of fluid, sank in her skull. At a time in her life when she needed to be as clear-thinking as possible?as a writer, as a mother, as a woman attempting to strike out on her own after two decades of marriage?she was plagued by cognitive impairment and constant pain, trapped by her own brain?all while mystifying doctors and pushing the limits of medical understanding.

In this luminous and moving narrative, Andrea reveals the astonishing story of this tumultuous year?her fraught search for treatment; how patients, especially women, fight to be seen as reliable narrators of their own experiences; and how her life-altering recovery process affected both her and her family.

The mind-brain connection is one of the greatest mysteries of the human condition. In some folklore, the cerebrospinal fluid around the brain is thought to be the place where consciousness actually begins. Here, in the pages of The Beginning of Everything, Andrea seeks to understand: Where was “I” when I wasn’t there?

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Excerpt

I am an unreliable narrator. And yet, here in the doctor’s office, it is required of me to tell my story.
Where does it hurt? Does the pain change? When did this start?
These are valid questions, but attempting to answer them, attempting to explain from the inside out, seems impossible. At first because the pain is so distracting, a softball-sized hit to the base of my skull, my hands perpetually massaging it at the back of my head, as though it could be possible to ease it out physically, if only my fingers were strong enough. ... view entire excerpt...

Discussion Questions

1. The mind-brain connection is key to how we understand who “we” are. But what if the physical brain is not working how it should—in Andrea’s case, there is a leak in the cerebrospinal fluid that encases the brain—our sense of self begins to fall away as well. What other elements in Andrea’s life helped her retain who she was? And how did this experience change her?

2. As Andrea was struggling through her intense pain and the anxiety of not knowing what on earth was happening (not to mention the divorce and caring for her children), she ran into several road blocks while trying to get treated. What were they and how are they indicative of issues in the doctor-patience relationship? Was being a woman, especially a woman over forty, an issue?

3. Narrative and telling stories is a well known form of therapy for many people, whether it is PTSD or, in Andrea’s case, struggling to put together what happened during her “leak year.” What other instances did the idea of story-telling and narrative factor into Andrea’s recovery on in other areas of the book?

4. Community and connections are so vital to recovery. How did Andrea’s relationship with her children, as well as the other “leakers” she met through groups, come into play with her discovery?

5. How has Andrea sought to translate her own experience of “sickness” onto the page? Does she draw on her experience trying to tell her story to doctors and health professionals while she struggled for treatment?

Weblinks

»	Author's web site
»	Publisher's Book Info
»	WNYC Interview w Author
»	TheRumpus Author Interview
»	LennyLetter Interview with the author

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